My True Love

Love,
once an exiting on the road eye throw business for me..
Took me long way ahead to realize that it was not love..

Love,
once the touch of a strangers skin against mine...
lust lingered above my head and  long way ahead i realized that it was not love...

Love,
once bought men to me when i just dreamt of them..
not one lasted ..and  long way ahead i realized that it was not love...

Love,
once made me think of marriage and family and kids...
such an illusion it proved to me that once again,
long way ahead i realized that it was not love...

Love,
once showed me innocence of youth and heights of passion...
of dreams...of sex...of anything a woman can name and want on earth...
a bed of red roses,
with no thorns at all......but with full of thorns....
this one consuming me....at the same time releasing me
as a whole...........eating my brains, my nerves..

exploding my heart.....
burning off my tears........bringing back my tears...
showing me the ocean when i was rushing to fall........

 i ran.......to the ocean....afraid of water and its depth...still....ran..
and finally,..i drown.....deep and deep....searching for that voice....
that voice who bought me here........those deep eyes with immense love for me....
no where i found.......
i was drowning............i cant breath......there is no time....i have left no time.......

where are you.........i cant shout..........there is no voice...........
voice aint coming out.......

am drowning.............
was this love? was that not love?
yes it is....i mean.......yes it was..........but i lost it......

i kept close to me , all those false loves that ruined me...
but, i lost the true love...........

and for ever...........????

i miss you.............come back.............please come back............

have no time....i cant breath......

and  after long way ahead
i realize, that it was my love........my true

My Love........